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“Unless you are exceptionally sociable, meeting new people can be stressful and incredibly tiring, as well as fun.
It almost becomes a job of work called “finding The One’… Go deeper into yourself and explore new ways of meeting people.
“You are always thinking that there is someone better on the next swipe,” she says.
“Or after your one ‘okay’ date you might get straight back to Tinder without giving someone date number two.” Elle, a 33-year-old creative from east London, says apps have replaced the days of risk-taking because of unrealistic expectations of perfection.
Perhaps even for people who did join an app as single-and-ready-to-mingle, seeing the plethora of options on swipes and the mighty levels of power that come with literally swiping someone aside if they don’t fit your brief, it has stopped people meeting someone they otherwise might give a chance if they met in person.
River describes the “ease of the swipe” as sometimes being a hindrance to actually deciding on someone to meet up with.
So, how do you keep your energy up, make sure that you’re putting your best self out there, and avoid the Burn Out? Swapping out your profile pic gives you an instant lift in attention and messages.
It takes a lot of your energy to find someone you’re interested in, arrange a meeting, make yourself look presentable, show up, go through the time of getting to know someone, and sometimes (read: most of the time), it doesn’t turn out to be the be-all end-all relationship you were looking for.
It sounds cynical to say, but don’t get too attached too early. Don’t play games, but don’t throw your whole heart into the ring until you’re sure things are on solid footing.“The stakes were higher, you had to be really sure that you liked that person and were willing to take the risk, therefore the reward was much sweeter and the risk, sometimes worth it,” she says.“Those days are gone now that matches are instantly won, lost and unmatched and a catalogue roster of willing victims await when things don't go precisely the way one might want them to play out.More than a quarter of new relationships in the UK now originate from talking on a dating website or app and for young adults, being single is practically synonymous with having a Tinder profile ( I personally know several very happy couples who met on Tinder and would not have met if it were not for the app.) However, like everything, it is a choice. At the beginning of the year, River decided to take a hiatus as dating was becoming a bit of a drag.
“I was going on 2-3 dates a week and the hangover was killing me,” she jokes.It’s easy to get burned out if you feel like you’re going on a million of the same date over and over again.